Losses To Little Ones


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Reply Posted on: Oct 9, 2015 at 2:01pm
The delicious bergamot aroma wafts to my nose. Sipping Earl Grey tea to relax me before the scary task of writing a book about my three years of back-to-back pregnancy losses. Some of those losses could have been prevented but, due to lack of knowledge in the reproductive medical field regarding the role of immunology in miscarriage and infertility, the pregnancies sadly ended seemingly without reason.

Somehow sitting here with warm tea, sun streaming through the kitchen window, all the devastating news that my babies did not survive, all the useless treatments and doctors’ visits, the tears and pain seem so distant. Our adorable three-year-old son is now at school; Lord knows what he is up to at this very minute. Our one-year-old daughter sleeps peacefully in the bedroom. Now that they are here and all is right with the world, what is the point of remembering the time before?

The point is that there are countless women who are currently in the same confusing and heart-breaking boat that I was in years ago and I believe sharing my story and the excellent advice that was given to me may inspire some to keep searching or even just provide comfort in the knowing that there are others who have experienced the trauma of wanting children but not succeeding in that goal. The point is also to give credit to those who helped me to find the answers. I hope this book might help someone (even one person is worth it!) to find the right doctor, to dig a little deeper into their fertility madness to find a seed of sanity. The advice may or may not help to discover the key. I am not a medical professional so anything I write is to be taken simply as a layperson’s experience and guidance. Now the teacup is empty of comfort. But I must forge ahead into the darkness of the past and dredge up that feeling of hopelessness and all the painful steps I took with my husband.

After a total of six early pregnancy losses plus a year’s worth of “infertility treatment” which included two failed IUI’s and one failed IVF, I discovered reproductive immunology through hundreds of Google searches and infertility discussion boards. I hit the jackpot when I came upon the yahoo reproductive immunology board. It was by reading women’s stories which were similar to my own and exchanging emails that I learned that I was not alone and was given priceless advice. On this board I heard about Dr. Jeffrey Braverman’s practice, now called “Braverman IVF & Reproductive Immunology.” Dr. Braverman, a genius in the burgeoning field of reproductive immunology, discovered through blood work that my immune system was overreacting and creating a hostile environment for the baby, hence the recurrent pregnancy loss. Through his protocol, catered to my specific immune issues, we were able to conceive and carry to term two consecutive pregnancies. He turned my angry womb into a welcoming, baby-friendly space!